Last Day of 24

I can’t believe tomorrow I am turning 25 years old! I am one of those people who really loves my birthday. I like celebrating a year gone by and a year to come. Sounds a little sentimental but I like looking at my small accomplishments each year and acknowledging them. Sometimes my accomplishments aren’t all that monumental, but sometimes it’s about patting yourself on the back for just being a freaking good person and being dedicated to what’s important in your life. I love celebrating with the people who have shaped my life in so many ways.

Tomorrow, turning 25, for me is about having a happy day and switching up my ‘norms’. Sure I’ll try to make it to the gym in the morning but I won’t have greek yogurt after – maybe I’ll have a BAGEL. WOW. Yes I am making fun of myself here. Going out to dinner with my family and friends for some cheesy, guacamole, margarita-filled evening and not feeling an ounce of guilt (although my stomach might feel more than an ounce of discomfort after all that fried goodness). Enjoying my sister coming into the city for just a night to be able to celebrate and having her at my apartment after for a cozy girls night.

On Saturday I get to primp and pamper — getting my hair blown out, makeup did, and wearing a dress that I would have NEVER had the guts to sport a couple of years ago. Just to celebrate myself for a second. I get to have friends over, go out, and drink and dance. I’m so excited and happy. There’s so many things that I am looking forward to in my future. Sometimes I’m frustrated but at other times I just try to be content with where I am. I used to try to make sense of everything and now I realize I can’t make sense of much – sometimes you just have to kind of go with it and keep praying and believing in yourself.

I think I learned a lot of this from my eating disorder. There’s a couple of birthday’s that are so wishy-washy to me because I was just so not confident that I don’t remember a thing. Maybe I did that on purpose. I am so different now from when I struggled with an eating disorder, it’s unreal. The work that went into becoming a confident, fun, and outgoing young woman took a lot of work. Like — a fucking lot. So this is why I am celebrating. For my 25th birthday I am vowing to myself to continue to hold my head up high, to maintain a sense of purpose and confidence. To be a good person, to hang tight to my beautiful friends, to be grateful for my family, and to love myself fully.

So here’s to 25 — can’t wait to see you.